Hi, my name is Kathleen Parker and I am dried-out, jealous hack. I am jealous because I am not as pretty, smart, savvy or popular as Sarah Louise Palin. I am so jealous, that I am going to write in my diary about how I think she isn't ready to be vice president and how she should step down from her nomination.I wish I had five beautiful children and a hot husband like her. I wish I could be a pageant winner. I just sit at my desk all day and write hate speech about one of the most prominent women in the world. I hate myself.
I say hideous things like:
"Palin filibusters. She repeats words, filling space with deadwood. Cut the verbiage and there’s not much content there."
"If BS were currency, Palin could bail out Wall Street herself."
I like to say that she is "out of her league" knowing damn well that I couldn't get to her level even if I sucked off the entire National Republican Party and let John Boehner do anal on me. I am clearly not Christian, nor a Real American because I can't contain my rage and just be happy that another woman has made it to the top.
My name is Kathleen Parker and it is an honor to be here with the rest of you on the Prayer List.
No comments:
Post a Comment